Ukraine

Heartbroken over the war in Ukraine. It's difficult to find a balance of watching enough CNN to be aware of the daily details, while not watching so much as to be completely absorbed in it. 

It's incredibly ridiculous in the modern world for one jackwagon individual to cause so much death and destruction. It's frustrating that we can't do anything militarily without risking world war. So glad to see companies participating in cutting Russia off temporarily, along with government sanctions. If these are the only measures we can take at this time, more companies need to get on board.

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Clash of the What?

Based on the ads, the bands on the show "Clash of the Cover Bands" aren't cover bands. They're tribute bands. Weird. Why not "Clash of the Tribute Bands"? Alliteration shouldn't be that important. If it is though, to be fair...

...there may not be a good T word to use for "clash." 

This morning in a "Happy Thanksgiving" text, Kimberly messaged me a photo of myself our senior year of high school. I'm at her house by the fireplace, on my way to a Prince concert (the Purple Rain tour), wearing high heeled boots, a mini skirt and a super-awesome 80's top, with my hair in an up-do, and I look mostly... SO TALL. YES! 

The only time I've ever actually been tall was in fifth grade. I reached my full adult height (5'4) the summer before that year, and the rest of my classmates spent the next 2-3 years catching up... and eventually passing me by. As an added bonus, my hair was thick and wavy, and it frizzed in the Houston humidity, and I would not figure out how to tame it until I got a curling iron (thankyouJesus) in sixth grade. 

I was in a trio of best friends during that time- Lori, Kim (another Kim!) and me- and Kim had a "boyfriend" in fifth grade for a few weeks. That little twerp always called me Amazon Woman. (It sounds vaguely racist today, right? They haven''t been around since 500 A.D., so it's prolly not an issue.) I had no idea what he meant. When I asked him, he said Amazon women were tall and had big hair. He could have said, "You know, like Wonder Woman!" But no. 

Now, living life in the petite section, it's hilarious that long ago, I was so freakishly tall that someone made fun of me for it.

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Colonoscopy!

On an unrelated note- I explained Fudgsicles to Scott and Julie the other day. It reminded me of that time I took toddler Lauren to "Mixed Age" Mothers Club playgroup, and a mom with an older child brought lollipops, and Lauren was like, What the heck is this? 

It isn't easy to describe a Fudgsicle.

Just saying.

So... I had my first screening colonoscopy this morning! Whee! The colonoscopy itself was nothing. Easy peasy. Had propofol and was in and out of the place within an hour of the start of the procedure.

The prep diet wasn't bad- two days of low-fiber diet followed by a day of liquids only. The low-fiber diet is fine. Any diet with pasta, chocolate and cheese on it is good by me. The liquids-only day is okay. You'll be good and hangry by the time you start taking the prep meds.

The prep medications did suck, as reported by millions before me. I used the Plenvue prescription prep. The doc's office and pharmacist say today's preps are far better than 10 years ago, in volume (reduced from gallons to pints), taste (fruit punch or mango... and SALT - ACK), and ease of gastrointestinal expulsion (no cramping, nausea, etc. just expulsion). Only... the TASTE though. Egads. I made it through the first round of mango/salt solution. The second dose (fruit punch, much better than the mango I think) I got down about 3/4 of the glass and then upchucked it all. I finished the last 4 or so ounces (yes!!). It was still fine.

The chaser drink, after completing the med, should be something tart, like lemonade or limeade (pulp-free of course, just use a powder mix). I tried ginger ale and it was more of the uber-sweet taste of the prep, which was just too too much sweet. *shudder*

I am thrilled to report that I got a score of 9 (the maximum, no 10, why?!) on the clearing out of my GI tract, so when Jeff has his colonoscopy next week, it's totally a competition.

Bonus- They gave me photos of my colon, which I can't wait to show my daughter! If only I were still a scrapbooker!

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Pepsi Ad

I have absolutely no idea why everyone thinks the Pepsi commercial that got yanked today is referring to Black Lives Matter. There is an extremely diverse crowd there, clearly including as many races and backgrounds they could think of. The signs are all about love and peace. To me, it read very "Anti-Trump Rally" (which is something we can all get behind, yes?).

Either way, I agree there is a big issue with the rich white model as the heroine. "Let me take a few minutes out of my very privileged life to march in your little protest, although I am completely clueless what your issue is." Just... yuck.

Have a non-white child approach the president with a Pepsi. Now that would be thought-provoking imagery for Pepsi's "global message of unity, peace and understanding."

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Lunch with the Work Homies

Had a fun lunch with two of my programmer buddies today. When conversation turned to a certain office "problem child," as it always seems to at some point, I realized something. You know the irrational, self-doubting thoughts even the most qualified and esteemed people have now and then, in positions of responsibility and power, where you are pretty sure the world is about to figure out that you are a complete fraud? Well, this person is an actual fraud, who continues to display incompetence at just about every aspect of the job.

I wondered... does the problem child have those "they're going to figure it out" thoughts EVERY DAY? How incredibly stressful that must be.

Most likely though, this person just thinks everyone else is stupid.

Anyhoo, they asked if I would please come back to the office, which was very sweet. I would love to work with them again every day. Perhaps it shall be so, someday, when we're working together at the Fair and Unbiased News Network!


Friday Food Survey

1. How do you feel about golden Oreos?

They are an abomination.

2. What is your favorite dessert topping?

Chocolate sauce

3. What is your favorite flavor/brand of bubble gum?

Super Bubble original flavor

4. Favorite cheese?

lately- Cotija

5. Favorite Lunch Meat?

salami

6. Favorite ice cream flavor?

mint chocolate chip

7. Best looking food?

roasted salmon

8. Best food to put cheese on?

flour tortilla

9. Best sexual food?

grapes

10. Best tasting drink in the summer?

sweet tea

11. Best tasting drink in winter?

mocha latte

12. Best food for a night out with friends?

Mexican

13. Best foods to eat with a roll?

turkey with gravy, pasta with marinara sauce

14. Messiest food, in your opinion?

barbecued pork ribs- yummy!

15. Easiest food to prepare?

cereal

16. Cheapest food you ever ate?

Many times, I would open and drain a can of tuna, squirt mustard into it, and eat it for lunch or dinner in college. It was like 40 cents.

17. Most expensive food you ever ate?

Probably a tie between swordfish at Eddie V's and ribeye at Austin Land and Cattle, both $35-ish for just the entree.

18. Stinkiest food you ever ate?

I'm pretty sure Dad never convinced me to try the Limburger cheese he ate all the time when I was a kid. I think the stinkiest was the onion sandwiches he made for himself and me back then. Two pieces of bread covered in mayonnaise, with thick slices of yellow onion in between. Lots of salt and pepper and Mom giving us the stink-eye (no pun intended) in the background, because she said it was horrible and had no nutritional value whatsoever.

19. Favorite dipping sauce?

Chuy's jalapeño ranch. YES.

20. Best pizza topping?

salami

21. Favorite potato chip flavor?

sour cream and onion

22. Most toxic substance you ever ate?

I've never eaten anything toxic.

23. Most calories you ate in one meal?

Probably at a Thanksgiving meal at my grandparents' place years ago. I may have had 2500 calories in a sitting, with all the standard dishes.

24. Favorite soda?

Coke Zero

25. Favorite flavor of juice?

My very favorite is grape, but I can't get past the calorie count, so I usually drink my second favorite- orange.

26. Favorite Vegetable?

snow peas

27. Favorite fruit?

watermelon

28. Worst canned food?

peas *shudder*

29. Best side dish?

onion straws- where can I get onion straws in this town?

30. Worst fast food restaurant?

Taco Bueno

31. Best restaurant?

Austin Land and Cattle

32. Best smelling food?

chocolate chip cookies

33. Favorite appetizer?

well-cooked and adequately seasoned fried calamari

34. Favorite cookie flavor?

chocolate chip

35. Favorite cake flavor?

chocolate

36. Favorite pie flavor?

cherry

37. Chocolate or rainbow sprinkles?

Chocolate. Rainbow sprinkles are incredibly gross.

38. Ketchup or Mustard?

mustard

39. Best food to have on a date?

some sort of boneless chicken, so you can use a fork effectively and not attach yourself to any unflattering scents, like fish or garlic

40. Most share-able food?

queso

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Deep Thoughts

I've just been sick over all this racial tension lately. One cannot hold all individual members of any group (police, blacks, whites, males, females, Muslims, Catholics, vegetarians ;) , or anyone else) accountable for the actions of a few, unless that entire group has declared that whatever is done/said is that group's policy/belief (Westboro Baptists, terrorist groups, etc.).

I'm so disappointed and saddened to hear racist hate speech from a loud few- on both sides. To simply distill incredibly complicated issues down to "cops vs. blacks" or "black vs. white" leaves many issues that need improvement to be ignored.

Relieved to see the majority of people expressing their thoughts peacefully and avoiding further violence. I see people reaching out to each other in day-to-day life as well.

Switching to another topic du jour... Melania Trump's speech. Obviously several sentences were lifted from Michelle Obama's speech. Also obvious- it couldn't have been done intentionally, unless there's a traitor in the campaign, with a plan to make them all look foolish. The source wasn't some obscure book they figured no one would ever realize had been plagiarized. It was a very public speech, so well liked that someone simply remembered it from years ago and immediately pointed out the error.

Important speeches like Mrs. Trump's are written by a team and analyzed over and over for accuracy, grammar and also specifically for unintentional copying from other speeches/text. My high school journalism teacher posted a link on Facebook to this TIME article that explains this very point.

How Melania Trump's Plagiarism Happened

They keep saying no one will be fired, but that person should absolutely be out today. If an epic blunder like this isn't punishable by firing, what is? If your job is speech writer, this should be the biggest learning moment of your speech writing life.

Bright side- maybe you'll get a funny nickname out of it for the rest of your career. In insurance sales.

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Bonus Rant!

Travis County Assistant District Attorney Erika Hansen was arrested last weekend for DWI. Travis County DA Rosemary Lehmberg pled guilty to DWI a couple of years ago, causing all sorts of drama, not just here, but around the state. I mean HONESTLY. Follow the laws you're supposed to be upholding.

So pathetic.

The real rant though, is that when this weekend's arrest showed up on social media and people started making nasty comments, because they are well-deserved, someone pulled out the tired retort, "You must be a Republican. If this were a Republican DA, you wouldn't say a word."

1) But since you're a Democrat and it's a Democrat DA, you're offended that anyone would say anything. Gotcha.

2) She's a Democrat? Who the hell knew? Or cared?

3) Wait for it... this will be the second segue rant of this post (a new record!)...

Why is the DA (the railroad commissioner, the tax assessor and countless other positions I'll leave alone for now) an elected position with a political affiliation? That position should be hired like any other county worker. Do these people make all their decisions based on conservative or liberal politics and what party leaders tell them to do? 

Like I said about these wackjobs who won't process gay marriage licenses- you don't get to decide what the law is. The law is what the law is. I certainly wouldn't imagine the DA is making daily decisions based on her political affiliation. If you're fashioning the law, we need to know when you'll be representing some party line. Otherwise, it isn't relevant.

I don't care what your political views are, if you can't follow the law, you shouldn't be responsible for prosecuting criminals. There are far more law-abiding citizens than not, so there are great lawyers aplenty, on both sides of the political realm, to replace you.

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Talkin' 'Bout My Geeeeneration

Watching a show about the current generation wanting money and success to come to them without putting in any work, desiring fame, feeling self-important. Well, this is what happens when every kid gets a participation trophy. This generation grew up with an award for showing up, helicopter parents who jump in to help at every turn and an education system that passes them from grade to grade with special allowances for every little thing. The now twenty-somethings want to live in a fabulous space at 22, make six figures by age 30, take expensive vacations and eat/drink at the best places. 

Another part of the issue is instant gratification in entertainment and news and social media. Everything happens fast and they want that instant positive response in every aspect of their lives. It all makes sense. Some of it is our fault as parents (which probably goes back to how we were parented) and some of it is the state of technology.

Of course, not all twenty-somethings fit this description, but it's definitely the prevailing type of personality. I hope for all of them that they can let go of the notion that everything will come easy and that they are entitled to have whatever they want when they want it, because as was also pointed out, this generation has the highest rate of depression and anxiety of any other. 

Take that pressure off yourselves. Adult life is a journey that almost always begins with very little money and a very little apartment. There are a lot of sandwiches for dinner. A few years down the road, things get more comfortable and you can look back and remember those simpler, but leaner times, and truly appreciate and be proud of how far you've come with the work you've put in and the goals you've accomplished. 

Saturday 9: Let's Dance (1983)
Unfamiliar with this week's tune? Hear it here.
In memory of David Bowie (1947-2016)

1) In this song, David encourages his partner to "put on your red shoes and dance." When did you last dance?

Thursday, doing Zumba with Lauren.

2) Mr. Bowie recalled that he and choreographer Toni Basil developed a dance step now known as "the moonwalk" for his 1974 tour, nearly a decade before Michael Jackson performed "Billie Jean." Can you think of something you should have gotten credit for, but didn't?

I don't think so.

3) Similarly, the band Roxy Music was upset because Bowie copied their "catsuit look" for his own stage wardrobe and made it famous. What do you usually wear, Monday through Friday?
Dark or black jeans, a dressy top and flats.

4) David Bowie was particular about the aftershave he wore, and one of his favorites was by Guerlain. Do you regularly apply cologne or aftershave?

I sometimes wear Philosophy Pure Grace perfume.

5) In school, David's best subject was art. Think back to your own school days. In which class did you excel?

math

6) In addition to art and music, David Bowie displayed a keen head for business, leaving a fortune of more than $600,000,000. Would you describe yourself as "good with money?"

I am very good with money. I've stretched a dollar like no one else and I've also managed investments after I had more money to work with.

7) Bowie also appeared in a variety of movies from The Man Who Fell to Earth to Zoolander. Who is your all-time favorite movie actor?

Harrison Ford

8) One of Bowie's hits is "Life on Mars." If you had the opportunity to travel into space, would you take it?

I wish I could say yes, but I would be really claustrophobic in the tiny cockpit.

9) The creators of SpongeBob Square Pants are huge Bowie fans and were thrilled when, in 2007, he appeared in an episode. Sam suspects that she may be the only person who hasn't seen that cartoon show. What about you? Have you ever watched an episode of SpongeBob, start to finish?

We're big Spongebob fans at our house. I've seen almost all the episodes from start to finish.

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Just One Overprivileged White Person's Opinion...

The University of Texas is considering taking down three statues of Confederate heroes on campus. There was a public forum yesterday where folks were able to share their opinions on the issue. The local news chose to air a comment from one black student who said of the white people who were speaking at the meeting, "I don't care what any of these overprivileged white people think... I'm offended (by the statues)."

Why select this hateful young lady's nasty comment, rather than air some thoughtful commentary from anyone else on her side of the discussion? This black racist is no different from any white racist, and I don't want to see her ignorant statement featured on the news, thankyouverymuch.

The media sure do enjoy stirring the pot.

Most of my confusion over Confederate heroes being featured and celebrated across the South relates to the fact that the Confederacy lost the war and ended up staying with the Union. I would have thought that these men would be less and less celebrated by southerners over time and their statues would have come down decades ago. No? It's always been weird to me. Maybe I'm missing something. It wouldn't be the first time. Perhaps they are all celebrated for reasons apart from their Confederate War contributions. Many of them, like Sul Ross (statue of him at A&M), were great leaders in their states after the war.

The Confederate flag isn't a big symbol in Texas, so I'm hardly an expert, but it has never signified slavery to me. I completely understand that many black Americans see it that way though. To most people, as evidenced by it's perpetual presence for 150 years without major issue, it's just a symbol of being a rebel, in a very general sense, like when a girl might say she likes a "bad boy." She doesn't mean she wants to date a serial killer (or some psycho racist who burns down a church). She just wants someone with a devilish twinkle in his eye, who might unexpectedly pop a wheelie on his motorcycle on that stretch of highway between College Station and Huntsville.

(I don't know anything about that, because I'm more of an "Everyone wearing their seatbelts?" sort of gal, but, you know what I mean.)

So if it's hurtful to a large group of Americans, maybe it's time to remove it. And maybe it's just plain old outdated. I don't really have a dog in that fight, so I leave it to the powers that be and the people who care about the flag to figure out. There is an issue though, with everyone being so flipping offended by everything these days. I thought we had finally swung around to a sort of acceptance of each other and our quirks and differences. It seems many individuals are becoming frighteningly intolerant of ideas different from their own, with a little prodding from the media to make a bigger, better story.

And to the owner of the Dukes of Hazzard TV show's General Lee, who is painting over the flag on the roof... The name of the car is the GENERAL LEE. Maybe the bigger socio-political statement would be to get rid of a car completely dedicated to the general. *eye roll*

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It's Against My Religion

Cannot believe the governor is allowing judges and clerks to "stand up for their religious beliefs" and simply choose not to provide same sex marriage licenses or perform same sex marriages. Seriously? Just like you have to wear a suit to work, or teach what your school curriculum tells you to teach, or sell Bibles if you work at a Bible store, every job has rules and requirements. We don't get to pick and choose what we do at work. You don't want to do your job? Then get another job.

Gah!

And by the way, we're all very wary of the "it's against my religion" excuse. If you say you personally disagree with the new law, you look like an ass. Use your religion to explain your bigotry, so you can feel morally superior and also be protected by the law. Be sure to pick and choose what you stand up for though. I'll bet these same people haven't ever vehemently refused to give marriage licenses to pregnant brides.

As long as they are marrying men anyway.

In other news... Crystal is GONE from the office. Waaaaaah. Not having her around all day at work is going to seriously suck. Since Tuesday, it just feels like she's on vacation. Once I realize it's forever, I'll be really bummed. Yesterday we celebrated the second person leaving us this week. That's three quitters in three weeks. We're dwindling. Who. Will. Be. Next?

This is the first day of my vacation!!! A whole week. It's been too long since I had time off. Sooo excited!


Friday 5 for July 3: Under

What goes under grape jelly? Jif peanut butter
What goes under your car? just oil change guys
What gets under your skin? people not fulfilling the obligations of their job, and not having the balls to quit because of their "religious convictions"
What’s the underlying cause of your latest figurative headache? someone at work who is driving multiple employees away
What do your underlings generally think of you? that I'm a supportive trainer, available for questions, and that I'm hilarious

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Bruce Jenner Interview

I watched the Bruce Jenner interview mostly because I love Diane Sawyer I am as surprised as most people are that a man I had always thought of as extremely masculine has always felt he is a woman.

But seriously, I do also think Diane Sawyer rocks. And I want to be like her when I grow up.

I don't have any issue with anyone being or becoming who they are, barring of course any sort of lifestyle that puts the person or their loved ones or anyone else in harm's way. I think it's interesting to hear how they've dealt with the feelings they struggle with and how they made the decision to cope with their particular differences in the way they've coped with them.

My only question was why someone would go through all of this at 65, after having lived one's whole life as a man. He talked about that specifically, and I get it now. I had no idea he had tried to transition in the 80's and then stopped or that he has been cross-dressing and wishing to be the person he feels like inside behind the scenes for all these years. He talked about dying and the tragedy of having never lived his true life, and that makes all the sense in the world.

I also understand that the people around him are shocked, as much as the public are. It's funny to think about how much of a role gender plays in our lives. For most of us, it's just not something to which we give a single thought each day, yet when Bruce Jenner tells us he's really a woman, we realize how much of our perceptions of a person are actually attached to their gender.

So... shocked? Yes. Supportive? 100%. He will be a much needed voice for those suffering through gender identity issues.

There was show on on one evening this week, where a transgendered woman was estranged from her young adult daughter. The daughter was crying and said, "You told me I can't call you 'Dad' anymore."

The father said it would be weird for her to call her "Dad" in public, since the father was a woman now. She wanted the daughter to call her by her name instead. If the daughter had been okay with that, then fabulous, but it meant a lot to her to call her father "Dad." She felt her father had left her to live a completely new life without her. It was incredibly sad.

So I found it very heart-warming when Bruce said he wants his kids to keep calling him "Dad"! 

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Summer Saturday

Another Texas football fan hit me with a totally random, nasty earful about the Ags yesterday. I wouldn't even have a clue if their team was having a good or bad season if not for an occasional comment from one of my Longhorn friends or accidentally catching the local sports news. This person seems to know every player and new recruit on our team.

Obsess on, girlfriend.

Speaking of football...

...FOOOOOTBAAAALLLLL!! Counting down to the SEC Network's inaugural football telecast- A&M/South Carolina on August 28!

Well, it's finally happened. Scott is going to a movie. He hasn't seen a movie at the theater since something like 1977, but he wants to see Lucy. He even organized a group outing! Hats off to the people who produced the Lucy trailer (or perhaps hats off to Scarlet Johansson's boobs) for inspiring even non-movie-goers to get out and see the film!

Saturday 9: Summerfling
If you're not familiar with today's song, you can hear it here.

1) This song refers to the summer breezes and winds of mid-July. Now that July is almost over, how would you describe this month's weather where you are?
Surprisingly cool for the norm. Today it will be 100 though.

2) The lyrics mention the "perfect plans." Do you have plans for today? Or will you just let this summer Saturday unfold?
We were going to drive out to Fredericksburg to eat at the famous Alamo Springs Cafe for lunch, but it's way too hot for that. This summer Saturday will just have to unfold.

3) This week's artist, k. d. lang, attended Red Deer Community College in Alberta. Red Deer's school colors are green, black and silver. What were your school colors?
A&M's colors are maroon and white

4) She had a bit part in the 2006 murder mystery The Black Dahlia. Do you enjoy murder mysteries?
I hadn't thought about it before, but yes! Lauren and I really enjoy watching Dateline and those other real life murder mystery shows. Also, my musical will be a comedy murder mystery. (Crystal's boyfriend's brother is a music producer and said he would back us. We've also decided it would be smart and fun to seek out hot movie actors with a desire to return to Broadway for the lead roles. Hugh Jackman anyone?)

5) Ms. lang is a vegetarian. What's the last beef, chicken, pork or fish you ate?
I had Slovacek sausage for lunch yesterday.

6) In 2000, when this song was released, California suffered a series of blackouts. Has your power gone out this summer?
I don't think so.

7) Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire also came out in 2000. Did you read it?
I did not.

8) Which would you rather have on your hot dog: sauerkraut, ketchup/mustard/relish or chili?
Mmm, sauerkraut. But I normally have ketchup and mustard.

9) If you had your choice, which would you prefer: new shoes or a new wallet?
New shoes!

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Happy Mothers Day!

Happy Mothers Day to all my mommy friends!

I was just telling Jeff that I never remember the date of my mom's death, not even the year. Others seem to know their parents' death dates off the top of their head. I think it was 2006. It was Christmas time. Of course I can look it up in a plethora of places if I want to, but I just don't think that date is one I need to remember. I'll always remember her birthday, and to me, that day and Mothers Day are the special days of the year to really honor her.

So Happy Mothers Day. Mom! You are missed every day. I still tell stories about you all the time. Just this week, my office mate was moved to say, "What a great mom!" when I told her something about you. Through our memories, you continue to inspire others to be the best versions of themselves they can be.


Sunday Stealing: A Movie Meme

1. What is your all-time favorite "costume" movie or period piece?
Moulin Rouge

2. What classic film would you nominate for a remake?
The Breakfast Club- It's SO good, but there is enough distraction from dated music, clothing, etc. that it is probably lost on today's teens. The message is still valuable and updating it would make it relatable.

3. Name your favorite femme fatale. 
Lara Croft, Tomb Raider

4. Name the best movie with the word "heaven" in its title. 
Heaven Can Wait

5. Describe the worst performance by a child actor that you’ve ever seen. 
any performance of Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen

6. Who gets your vote for most tragic movie monster? 
King Kong

7. What is the one Western that you would recommend to anybody? 
Tombstone

8. Who is your ideal movie-viewing partner? 
Someone who is going to be quiet during the movie, not look at me every two seconds to see if I am laughing/crying/etc. and who will want to chat about the movie afterwards.

9. Has a film ever made you want to change your life? If so, what was the film? 
I can think of a lot of films that have moved me to be a better person in some way, but not to "change my life."

10. Think of one performer that you truly love. Now think of one scene/movie/performance of theirs that is too uncomfortable for you to watch. 
George in Batman and Robin.

11. On the flip side, think of one really good scene/performance/movie from a performer that you truly loathe. 
Tom Cruise in Top Gun

12. What movie has the best soundtrack? 
Purple Rain and Moulin Rouge

13. Favorite actor with a mustache?
Tom Selleck

14. Shadowy film noir from the 1940's or splashy colorful musicals from the 1950's? 
Splashy colorful musicals

15. Favorite classic Disney?
The Little Mermaid. Or if we're going really classic- my childhood fave was Cinderella.

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I Ain't Sayin' She a Gold Digger

Discussion at lunch Thursday, because Mel (married two years last week) suggested we should all marry the second time for money (ahaha!)--

Kyra: ...I don't know what I would do with that much money. Well, other than I would travel. First class!
Me: Oooh. Me too. Or I would just charter planes and skip the hassle at the airport.
Kyra: Yeah! And I might buy a really cool car, like a Tesla.
Me: I'd get a BMW Z4. I definitely wouldn't buy multiple houses though. Too much maintenance.
Kyra: No, and you don't want to leave them empty for months at a time.
Me: So I'd do a lot of traveling... buy a Z4... and probably just invest the rest.
Crystal: Yeeeaaahh. I'd probably pick up a drug habit.

She cracks me up!

I did point out that if one is being so pragmatic as to plan a marriage for money, it should be one's first marriage. You're young. He/She is old. They die soon and leave you their estate. You marry the second time for love and live out your days together with a cool car you rarely drive because you're flitting around the world on a charter plane every other week. Yes?

Saturday 9: Here Comes Peter Cottontail (1950)

1) Which do you prefer: colored hard-boiled eggs, chocolate marshmallow eggs, or plastic eggs with coins inside?
Colored hard-boiled eggs. I'm not a fan of chocolate covered marshmallow and chocolate coins invariably suck.

2) What's your favorite color of Peeps (yellow, purple, or pink)?
I don't eat Peeps. *shudder* Melissa did just tell me about this cool game called Peep Wars. You stick a toothpick in two Peeps as their "swords," then put them in the microwave. Then the one who pricks the other first (while they are expanding with the heat) wins. This is a great use for Peeps.

3) All this talk of sweets is making Sam hungry. What's for lunch?
We grabbed some Whataburger.

4) This song was introduced by country singer Gene Autry and it's still a favorite. Please share some of the lyrics. (And you're on your own; Sam didn't include a link to the song this week.)
...Hippity hoppity Easter's on its way!

5) Gene Autry was so popular that a town in Oklahoma named itself for him. Have you ever been to Oklahoma?
We visited Jeff's college friend Steve when Steve lived in Tulsa years ago. We drive through Oklahoma when we go to Missouri to visit Jeff's relatives.

6) In addition to singing, Mr. Autry made 93 cowboy movies. What's the last movie you saw?
Rented- About Time (very good, from the director of the indescribably wonderful Love, Actually)
Theater- Cheap Thrills (also very good in a completely different way than About Time)

7) He and his horse Champion also had a TV show. Can you name another famous horse?
Mr. Ed, who is way before my time, a testament to his popularity. Or to the lack of famous horses.

8) Gene Autry also recorded "Rudolph, The Red Nosed Reindeer," and it was, of course, wildly popular, too. Who is your favorite recording artist?
If I have to pick a single recording artist as an all-time fave, I've got to go with Elvis Presley, although iTunes would indicate Kelly Clarkson as my favorite. :)

9) Back to the holiday celebration at hand -- Easter is considered the season of rebirth. What leaves you feeling refreshed and rejuvenated?
happy music, a shower with my favorite soap, a breath of fresh air after being indoors for hours

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Coming Soon: Unisex Bathrooms

But first... You can't get away for a nooner at a small company without everyone being all up in your business. Mel randomly disappeared for a long lunch today and everyone and their brother asked Jennifer and me where she was. (She said it wasn't a nooner when I made that joke. Yeah, yeah...)

So yeah. I think the next big thing is unisex bathrooms. Not the one-off, single room ones, but making all public bathrooms open to both genders. We've pretty much abandoned separate men's and women's fitting rooms, so bathrooms are the next logical thing.

That will mean more bathrooms for the ladies. YES. They would have to get rid of urinals though. What will guys do for social time?

There will be a lot more sex in bathrooms, with everyone going in there.

Just saying.

KathyL: I've actually seen unisex bathrooms before. They just have doors on the stalls that go all the way to the floor.
Me: Cool. Then the only thing missing is a space to straighten your cami or adjust your bra or whatever, since you can't just do it in front of the sink anymore.
KathyL: They could put mirrors on the inside of the stall doors. Then you can just adjust things in the stall.
Me: That makes it even MORE interesting for all the people having sex in there. Heck... now I'm looking forward to this.

Heh.

Friday 5 Bonus Questions

1. If someone insisted on paying for it, would you rather have a gardener, a housekeeper, a personal chef, a driver, or a personal assistant?
EASY! A personal chef.

2. If someone insisted on paying for it, would you rather have a personal masseuse (or masseur), a sex surrogate, a personal trainer, a therapist, a makeup artist and hair stylist, or a life coach?
Makeup and hair, please.

3. Would you rather have a non-creepy secret admirer who sent you the occasional small gift and admiring note, a professional agent who kept an eye out for your next job and applied on your behalf and negotiated your salary, a private investigator who found out what people are saying about you and found out interesting things about people you know, or a personal photographer to capture all your special moments in ways that always made you look your best?
Personal photog.

4. Would you rather have limitless closet space (for clothes only), limitless shelf space (for books and music only), limitless hard-drive and cloud storage, or an eidetic memory?
Eidetic memory.

5. Would you rather have perfect pitch, the ability to do long or tricky math problems quickly in your head, ambidexterity, an inerrant BS detector, or the uncanny ability to know exactly what the weather’s going to be like in your neighborhood within twenty-four hours?
Perfect pitch.

6. In what way have you stubbornly refused to grow up?
Being an enthusiastic fangirl of talented musicians.

7. In what way have you stubbornly refused to be open-minded?
I can't stand when people convicted of heinous crimes spend decades in prison and then suddenly get off. After all their trials and all the evidence over all those years, someone magically gets them out of trouble. It takes a LOT to even make it into prison at all. I think some are just able to play the system.

8. In what way have you stubbornly refused someone else’s kindness?
I lost a baby several years ago when I was six months pregnant. A girl I knew at the time happened to be in a support group for moms who had experienced a stillbirth. She talked with me and invited me to join their group. She was incredibly sweet and helpful, and normally I'm receptive to that sort of kindness. It was just one of those situations where, at the time, I didn't want to be the center of attention, nor did I want to champion any causes or become a part of a group. Many feel comforted by those very things, but for me in that situation, it was overwhelming.

9. In what way have you stubbornly refused to be apologetic?
I refuse to be apologetic for my fangirly behavior at concerts. :p

10. In what way have you stubbornly refused to take a short cut?
There are so many things in life that don't have short cuts, that I take any that I can!

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Friiiiiii-daaaaay! YEEAH.

Those of you who don't have a balance disorder might be interested to know that parking garages sway a lot. Only a few things make me feel woozy, but swaying floors (like at the Erwin Center when Bruno Mars is performing) will do it.

In other news... Oh the drama at work. Holy. Crapsticks.

That's all I have to say about that.



(That video's for you, CJ. *snort*)

So... people are talking about the newly cast actress who will play Wonder Woman in the movie. Most are complaining that she is too thin to play the part. I agree. A tiny, waifish woman isn't going to save anyone from a burning building or bash around some collossal bad guy. She's gorgeous, but it's just like casting Adam Levine as Thor. Not that he isn't hot as all get-out, but he doesn't have a superhero body. ("Yoga body," remember? *ahem* Get out your mats, ladies...)

And now I'm going to have some wine and start my weekend. (You may think I've already been drinking, but no!) I hope you have all had a wonderful week and will have an even better weekend!

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Random Wednesday

It's incredibly strange to see a friend become Facebook friends with the ADULT CHILD of one of your high school pals. I just can't believe my high school buddies have adult children. The whole thing is just superweird.

Speaking of adult children, my baby turns twenty this weekend, so, there's that.

And speaking of disturbing things (segueing--- it's an art)... Is anyone else completely creeped out that there is a student/school-nurse relationship happening on Glee? That's how you know you've run out of plot lines. You pitch the idea that a student gets it on with the nurse. During school. And your colleagues go, "YES! Let's run with that." Set it to happy, cheesy music and no one will notice the inappropriateness. Ack.

Speaking of boyfriends... Cathy has a new boyfriend. Billy! (♪ Weeee waaaant Biiiilly. Wheeeere iiiiiiis Biiiiilly? B-I-double L-Y, we're aaaaaall hiiiiiiis...) Billy lives here in Austin, so she'll be here more often. How awesome is that? We're going to do the double date thing next time she's up. She was here last weekend and he had to work on Saturday, so she ended up going to the game with me. It worked out perfectly! Maybe she'll finally move here. We'll see if Billy makes it past Cathy's three-week relationship limit. (Ahahaa. J/K, CJ!)

Speaking of... um... quantum leaps... Most of the girls from work feel guilty about things like getting manicures on their WFH days. I go grocery shopping on my WFH days and I don't feel guilty one bit. I do feel guilty writing in my blog at the moment. But I can't access the work computer right now, so what am I supposed to do? :)

During my teleconference this morning with Matthew at our England vendor, he told me that they are in the middle of their company's annual "American Thanksgiving Bake-Off." He has entered a Coca-Cola Pecan Pie. If he wins the department, he advances to the company-wide competition. Winners from the company-wide contest are able to enter the Christmas Bake-Off in December. Superfun!!

Meanwhile, back at my company, a data management girls' trip is in discussion. I was thinking Vegas. Crystal was thinking New Zealand. Seriously. (I guess if I were 29 and single, I'd say New Zealand, too. But mama needs a new kitchen, so not this year.)

Alright... going to try my work connection again...

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Thanks, Mom!

First off... BTHO Mississippi State! WHOOP!

OK. Sit down kiddies. Auntie Kath is going to tell you a story - or a few stories.

(OH. That reminds me- I have my first official nickname in the history of my entire life. I've had cute nicknames by which people have somewhat routinely addressed me in notes or letters or yearbooks or texts/IMs, but never one that anyone called me on a day-to-day basis. Ready? Our company COO calls me Kath. Not here and there, but every single time he talks to me. He's not that guy who just shortens everyone's name either. I think it's because we have history and we're buds from way back. Yeah sure, I'd rather it were something cool, like "Stretch" or "Glitter," but Kath will do. So cool!

Crystal has a nickname for almost everyone except me. I hate it. She says it's a good thing, but I disagree. She calls our HR girl "Lois" because she looks like Lois Lane. She calls one of her clients "Martine" because she likes to imagine that he's an exotic, handsome foreign man, when in actuality, he's a geeky American statistician. One day I will get a Crystal nickname. One day.)

Well that was quite a digression. And I know I'm neither a Stretch nor a Glitter. Probably a good thing not to be a Glitter.

Anyhoo... Years ago, my mom had a big garage sale, before moving to Austin. Laura and I went down to help her price things. The "Greeeeeat! Byyye!... She's not coming" story came from that weekend.

At some point, we were looking for a missing little metal chain piece to something. As a perfect example of how organized my mom was, despite appearances at times, she instructed us to go into the garage, make a path through a metric buttload of garage "stuff" under two inches of dust to a secretary desk underneath a bunch of boxes, a stack of magazines and a old coat. In the pull-down part of the desk, there were little drawers and shelves. "Open the pull-down and in the second shelf from the top on the left, way in the back, behind the spool and the empty ring box, you'll find that chain."

Laura and I looked at each other like Mom had lost her mind.

Right.

Well, the chain was RIGHT THERE, in that anonymous little spot, where it had been resting since before Reagan was president. We couldn't believe it. I can't even locate the sunglasses I had on five minutes ago.

Another side note- In the hours after Mom died, while we spent time with her, I never felt her "there" in the room with us (my uncle Rob and me). I had been prepared for her passing, as she was very very ill for about a week prior and we had known she wasn't going to make it. I had a very strong feeling that she was going to always be with me afterwards, in a spiritual sense. We were very close and I just knew I would be able to feel her energy around me after she was gone. But the minute she died, I was keenly aware that she wasn't around.

Matter-of-fact, I never felt her anywhere for a long time.

It really upset me, because I had anticipated something so different. I even went into a whole questioning of my faith and if there is an afterlife at all. (WOW. This took a turn, eh?) I talked with my aunt after several weeks and told her about it. I asked if maybe she felt Mom was with her, because she certainly wasn't with me. She told me, "YES. She's definitely here! I've really needed her. Maybe that's why.." etc. etc. I wasn't sure if she was trying to help me cope with the loss of my mother or my crisis of faith or if she was being honest, but it was a little reassuring and I was happy that she felt Mom was with her if she needed it at the time (she wasn't able to come to see Mom just before she passed).

So. Fast forward to yesterday. I was working on a budget issue for one of my studies.

About 2 months ago, I had written notes on a small piece of paper- a list of casebook pages and explanation of how I had come up with some prior budget numbers around the casebook design. Back when I put it in the stack of trash paperwork I keep by my desk to take to the shredder sometime, I remember thinking I should possibly keep it. But I didn't.

I usually go to the shredder every couple of weeks, but every time I've picked up that stack recently, the phone has rung or something has come up to stop me. I've been thinking how tall the stack is getting for a while now.

While I was trying so desperately on Friday to remember what was on that silly piece of trash paper, and wishing that I had kept it, I finally thought I should take a chance and look through the trash stack. Who knew. Maybe it was in there somewhere, although I had most likely tossed it with the last batch.

I reached up and grabbed most of the stack, down to about the bottom 15 pages or so. I lifted it up.

That paper was sitting, face up, with those glorious numbers I needed, RIGHT IN THAT SPOT. I kid you not.

First thing that popped into my head was that Mom had directed me there. Totally random thought. Go to your shredder stack, pick up about 224 sheets of garbage paper, about 15 from the bottom...

So yeah. Thanks, Mom!

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Up Too Early for a Saturday

Cathy is on her way to the ATX. Whee! It's not Vegas, but it'll do in a pinch. We're going to Gavin DeGraw/Train tomorrow and we're both taking off Monday. So YAAAAY!

I thought of my mom when I was making up the guest bed with fresh sheets this morning. Mom was an army brat and she taught me that when you want to make a bed really fast, you don't walk back and forth from side to side, like we all do, tucking and straightening each layer on each side. You pull and tuck and make up one side and then do the other. It actually works!

While I have a few minutes, I have to talk about this minimum wage thing. People who work at fast food restaurants as a career do not make minimum wage. Sorry, but they just don't. They start at minimum wage and then they get raises and promotions, just like the rest of the free world. There is an evolution to working. You don't make $7.25 an hour for 50 years until you retire from McDonald's.

If someone has a family, and can't get a job that requires training or education, and wants to work in fast food or any of the other places that start at $7.25 an hour, that is their choice. There are other jobs that pay more. It may be night shifts or physical work or some other less desirable environment than McDonald's, but there are choices, if money is the prime concern. There are also other industries (healthcare for example) that have positions that start at minimum wage, but who promote into far better paying positions or whose benefit packages may even pay for employees to go to college. It's all about choices in life.

If people made $15 an hour as a newbie working at Burger King (that's $30,000 per year for a 40-hour work week), who would ever go to school or train to take a $15 an hour first job as a programmer or a plumber? What a waste of time.

There is monetary value to acquiring a skill or advanced education. There is also monetary value to staying at a fast food or retail job started without any time or money or stress invested in acquiring experience or education beforehand, and then working one's way up to supervisor, manager, etc. There should be monetary value to all of those things.

Raise minimum wage to $15 per hour and all other industries/jobs will have to raise pay accordingly. The costs of everything we buy as consumers will go up as well. Not that I would mind the raise, but the country will go broke doing that.

Just my two cents. That'll getcha about one piece of salt water taffy from the bulk bin.

Avoid banana.

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Gross Post Du Jour

Today I saw a cup ring on the metal toilet-paper-slash-tampon-trashcan thinger in a bathroom stall at work.

A cup ring.

Ladies, please don't bring your drink into the stall. If you absolutely have to bring your drink into the bathroom, place it on the counter by the sink.

Speaking of public toilets, the other day, J and I started out talking about... something that I can't really get into here... which led to how wild animals don't have butt cheeks, so they don't need toilet paper, and that they don't need the padding because they lie down and never sit, and how they don't poop sitting down...

Yeah, typical conversation.

Jeff: A lot of my coworkers stand.
Me: To poop?!
Jeff (amused and disgusted): No! They stand at their workstations. How would I know if the guys at work poop standing up?

Um. Boys pull out their goodies and pee in front of each other every day. They don't watch each other poop?

Have some decorum like us ladies... who enjoy a cool, refreshing beverage while we pee.

(Okay, boys. You win this one.)

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