"...I Lost my Sh** Because of You..."

Tuesday, September 10, 2013

My hair felt so gross after the rain Saturday night. I always think that rain is pure water and should be great for hair. Jeff said something about how when it rains, the rain leaves gunge on our cars, probably environmental junk it picks up in the air. It must leave the same gunge on our hair.

Sort of takes the magic out of turning your head to the sky and letting it rain into your mouth, doesn't it?

Anyhoo... The work girls and I finally went to our burlesque class last night! SO FUN. I was voted sexiest freestyler on the pole, thankyouverymuch. Well, of our group. The "regulars" were really amazing.

We learned a LOT in an hour. Our instructor taught us two minutes of dance/strip choreography (which would be followed by two minutes of freestyle pole). We learned and practiced most of the class, and then finished with two "performances" in a dark room with nightclub lights flashing.

The choreographed portion included skills like hair flips, body frisking, rollovers, sexy push-ups from the floor, "sexy crawling," fan kicks in stilettos, removing your bra straps without looking like a dork like a total professional, and the best move of all... unhooking your bra with one hand and the associated benefits of doing so. (See, if you use two hands, you have to toss the bra. With one hand, you can hold it over your chest and extend the tease.)

In class, you wear a prop bra on the outside of your shirt. (Of COURSE. You sillies.) Actually, the bra was just the "prop of the week." It could have been a hat, a scarf, thigh-highs, etc.

We also learned that strippers put clinical strength antiperspirant on their hands to avoid getting the pole sweaty and slippery. There's a joke in there somewhere, but I'm not about to go there.

Our song was Nine Inch Nails' "Piggy."



If you don't have a pole at home, you can "wall dance." It's the same as pole dancing, but rubbing around on the wall. It's a pretty good substitute, as long as you're not looking to take things aerial. I guess one could roll around on the couch back or something... Ha!

They tout the classes as workouts and they really are. Best of all, it was one of the best Girls Night Out ideas ever! See if it's offered in your area!

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