Creeper Story of the Year

Sunday, December 18, 2016

Friday night, when we were grabbing a burger for dinner, there was a disheveled man slumped into a corner booth, talking on a cell phone. He was speaking loudly, talking to a girl. He seemed upset, and I thought maybe we should GET THE HECK OUT OF THERE. Then the conversation suddenly turned more pleasant, and they got onto video chat of some sort. It was obviously the first time they'd seen each other.

He went on and on about how pretty she was and how no one was ever going to tell either one of them anymore how they weren't good enough, etc. He professed his love for her, obviously for the first time, and asked when she was coming to see him in Texas. Soon he asked if her mom and dad were home. (Where is Chris Hanson when you need him?)

After a few minutes he said, "How old do you think I AM?! I'm only 38/48!"

38/48?

He mentioned he could "kick anyone's ass" because he'd spent 12 years in prison and 15 on the street. (Grab the food. We're OUT.) Well, that accounts for 27 of his 38/48 years.

At some point he said he had been in the military. He explained that his record says he was only in for two months, but he was actually in for a few years. Evidently, after two months, he was selected for special ops and when you complete special ops service, the government erases your records... AND YOUR MEMORY. "That's how they do it these days." Mmmkay.

"Hold on. I need some weed."

He leaves all his crap (jacket, bottles of water, money) on the table and exits the restaurant to smoke outside the door. We're in the 'burbs, y'all. People smoke their weed at home, not at a restaurant. ;)

He comes back in, still video chatting. We left.

That was the most disturbing meal experience I've had since the McDonald's incident when the kiddos were little. The manager had to call the police to remove a guy fussing with some electronic device and talking to himself at his table next to us. Laura and I stayed there longer than we should have as well. Ha!


Friday Five: Celluloid Heroes

1. What movie most recently impressed you with its score or soundtrack?

Bad Moms 

2. What movie most recently impressed you with its costumes or makeup?
Ex Machina

3.What movie most recently impressed you with its scenic backdrops?
La La Land

4. What movie most recently impressed you with its originality?
Passengers

5. What movie most recently impressed you with its dialogue?
Brooklyn

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