NYC/Cruise Re-Cap, Part II

The funny stuff!

New York City: At Ground Zero, we were following signs around the area with arrows that said "WTC PATH." When Jeff wanted veer off to find the Visitor Center, I said surely it was on the WTC Path and I wanted to follow it to see what was there. Turns out, WTC PATH is the rail system station (the Port Authority Trans-Hudson train), not a path at all.

New York City: After Ground Zero, we wanted to go to Grand Central Station. I said, "I wonder if the subway goes to Grand Central Station." I wish I could say I was trying to be cute.

Cruise Day 1: The comedian remarked about Royal Caribbean's newest ship, Oasis of the Seas (omg), that "it's so big that it has it's own bad neighborhood. Don't go down that hall, man! Those people are mean!"

Cruise Day 3: Fogged in at sea. The Captain's Cocktail Party was that night. They have to blow the horn in heavy fog every couple of minutes. We said we'd know if the Captain had too much champagne, because the horn would go from "baaaaah baaaaah" to "buh-buh-buh-BUH-buh... buh-buh"

Cruise Day 4: Love and Marriage Game. Three couples- newlyweds married one week, a couple married 20 years and a couple married 61 years- play something similar to The Newlywed Game. One question was "Where is the most unique place you've made whoopee?" The 80-something wife of the oldest couple said, "last night in the back row of this theater." Everyone cracked up. When the husband came out, he gave the same answer! Mike the Aggie newlywed went over to them and did the "I'm not worthy" bow. Hilarious.

St. John, NB: McLobster (a lobster roll) is available at McDonald's seasonally. No lie.

Cruise Day 6: Royal Caribbean has a fun game called "Battle of the Sexes." Typically this is the large lounge divided into two teams- ladies and guys. The ladies answer trivia questions about "guy stuff" and the guys answer questions about "girly stuff." Anyway, Jeff referred to this upcoming game all day as "The Sex Show." I don't think that one is on the family cruises.

Portland, ME: There is a microbrewery called 3 Dollar Dewey's. The Duck Tour guide joked that it got its name when it used to be a brothel with "1 Dollar Lookies, 2 Dollar Touchies and 3 Dollar Deweys."

Cruise Day 7: The comedian tonight said that when our home port in New Jersey used to be called Bayonne, the people there were like "(grabbing crotch) Yo! How you doin'?" Now that it is called Cape Liberty, people are all snooty and "How do you do? Welcome!" He also did a dead-on Jack Nicholson impression: "We went into Halifax... Back into the fog... Went into St. John... Back into the fog... Went into Bar Harbor... Back into the fog... You know we're going into the same port every day. They're just changing the signs."

Boston: Nothing made this Texan giggle more than a family from New Jersey making fun of the Boston tour guide's accent. "She's trying to say co-ah (car), but she's saying cah! Ahaha!"

Cruise Day 9: During the "Majority Rules" game, they asked what people would most like to see on the new Oasis of the Seas ship. Our team voted for a roller coaster. That was the second most popular. Number one answer? A strip club. I guess it could go in the bad neighborhood.