Oasis of the Seas Cruise

So I donated $500, in fifty-cent increments, under various aliases, to the Obama campaign for this Clooney thing.

Kidding.

It was $1000. ;)

OK, if I get to go to Mr. Clooney's bachelor pad with Kimberly, I will donate back my airfare, hotel, plus $50. That would be my first-ever donation to a political candidate. It's all about being involved in the process, folks.

Alrighty then---- The Oasis of the Seas. I must first say that the ship is utterly breathtaking. I've been on a lot of cruise ships, and this one is an engineering marvel, as well as a true beauty. You simply must take one cruise on this ship (or its twin sister, the Allure of the Seas) just to be awed and amazed for a week. TWO FlowRider wave machines... a zip line 9 decks over the Boardwalk... a Boardwalk with a working merry-go-round... putt-putt golf... two rock walls... ice skating rink...... a Promenade twice as wide as the Freedom class ships with the Rising Tide bar that floats up and down between it and Central Park three decks above... which is the green area of living trees and all kinds of plants and awesome restaurants and a wine/tapas bar...

Central Park. Real plants!

I could go on and on. You can see the ship's features in their full glory here.

It's just a week of "WOW" and OMG, from its passengers, and passengers on other ships docked nearby. The ship is a deck or two taller than the other super-huge ships, but more importantly, it's up to about 1.5 times as wide.

That's what she said.

The embarking/disembarking processes at the cruise terminal were pretty much flawless, which is an achievement in itself with 6000 passengers. The ship felt exactly as roomy as RCCL's others, seeming to have the same space to passenger ratio. You can always find open deck chairs, rarely stand in a line for anything, etc. That's one of RCCL's best features, with Carnival at the other end of the spectrum, having very little space per passenger and always standing in lines.

Our first stop ended up being one of our frequent mealtime hangouts- the Park Cafe. They have the best salads on board, because you walk the line, having them put in whatever appeals to you at the time, and they toss the whole thing in your choice of dressing and serve it to you in a huge bowl. They also have paninis and other sandwiches. The best is the roast beef, which is an incredible, melt-in-your-mouth experience.

After a few mealtimes there, we renamed the restaurant the Pissy Cafe, because unfortunately, passengers are frequently irritable in there for some strange reason. That is the only place we found anyone being rude to the staff. (RCCL staff are always exceptional standouts on the helpful/friendly scale. Best customer service on the planet.) One guy kept barking at a server behind the counter, "Hey! Get me my sandwich!!" I thought he was joking, but when I looked at him, he said, "It's my vacation, right?" I don't give a flip if it's your vacation, your birthday and your wedding day, buddy. You don't talk to anyone like that.

Anyhoo- at some point I figured out that most of the problem with passengers at the Pissy Cafe is the setup of the cafe itself. There are four lines- the salad line, the roast beef sandwich line, the hot sandwich line, and the dessert counter, which actually never has a line. You can get them to grab something from the refrigerated pre-made items in either of the sandwich lines. The cafe is small, so one line typically forms at the salad area on the left when it gets crowded. The people exiting the salad line naturally feed into the roast beef line, where inevitably a person walks in and appears to cut in front of salad guy to get a roast beef. When you're funneling through with a salad, it feels like you've been cut off.

They should have signs over each area that say they are separate lines. If you go in there, just enter the right door if you want a sandwich, and go straight to the counter to order.

As a second issue, there is limited seating at the Park Cafe, but passengers are allowed to sit at any outdoor seating they like, including the tables at Giovanni's and Vintages (you cannot sit inside either restaurant unless you are eating there).

In other food/beverage options that deserve a mention, there is self-serve frozen yogurt all over, mostly in the pool areas. Most of the machines are vanilla and chocolate, but they have strawberry at the center of the pools on Deck 15. The donut shop is very popular on the Boardwalk. Kids can get chicken nuggets and corn dogs at the Boardwalk Bar next to the Aquatheater and parents will find pre-made salads, sandwiches and terrific fruit options, like cantaloupe sticks and watermelon.

One of my favorite places on any of the RCCL ships is the Viking Crown Lounge. It's at the top of the ship and is usually practically empty. It's sophisticated and quiet and has about a 180-degree view from all the windows. Perfect place to relax and have drinks.

Entertainment-- With 6000 passengers, it's impossible to accommodate everyone with the traditional early and late headliner shows each night. The Oasis shows are done via reservation, and I recommend you make them early, as soon as you book your cruise. At most shows, there are long lines of people waiting to get in without reservations. At 10-15 minutes before showtime, they start letting them in, so get there in time if you do have a reservation.

Hairspray was terrific! We sat in the front row and tried not to sing along the whole time. We sat next to a guy who knew the cast (maybe a family member) who was singing along the whole time. Too funny. Ever wonder what happened to TV's Jim J. Bullock, from Too Close for Comfort? He's playing Edna in Hairspray on the Oasis. He and the girl who plays Tracy sang one night in the Viking Crown Lounge. SO great! He is hilarious.

Jim J. Bullock performing at the Viking Crown Lounge.

Don't miss the aerial show in the Opal Theater. It's amazing. There is a couple who do an act above the audience, where he's hanging from a hook or a scarf or something and tossing the girl around. Freakin' scary, but really beautiful choreography there.

The Aquatheater shows were so impressive. There are lots of jokes made about the shows being very obscure and artsy, which they are, but the world-class swimmers and divers are so talented. Don't miss them.

We enjoyed the comedy club so much- great comedians and also the improv show the last day on board. The improv features actors from Hairspray. And they are FUNNY! Recurring joke of the week- what a crappy place Nassau is. I have always thought that! It's time to take Nassau off the itineraries.

Leaving St. Maarten. Note one of two cantilevered hot tubs overlooking the ocean below. It was so nice!

Platinum Crown and Anchor members (and up) were invited to a champagne sail away party at Nassau, on the ship's limited-access helipad. One of the most fun events! We talked a while with one of the human resources staff there and she had tons of interesting info about the ship. Also met a couple from California there.

Everyone just HAD to stand on that H. What the heck.

Speaking of ship stories... we were talking with our stateroom attendant one morning on the balcony, asking him if he'd ever been on a voyage where someone went overboard. (What. We were curious.) The conversation wound around and he said it is more common than you think that couples drink too much, get into a huge fight and then sleep with other people on board to get back at each other. Wow! How many Mango Tangos do two people have to have to sleep with people at random- especially in a closed space like a cruise ship, where you're all going to be running into each other for the next seven days?

The Solarium has some fabulous, huge, round, cushiony chairs to lay in at the very front of the ship, looking straight out the windows. Don't settle for a deck chair when you lay out. :) Yes, I did get some sun. No burns!

I looked and looked online before I left to see the couch folded out in our stateroom floorplan, but couldn't find a photo anywhere. So for those who are curious...

Oasis of the Seas balcony room with sofa folded out.

The couch is folded up during the day, along the wall under the art. The sofa bed is very hard and bumpy (not that I ever slept in it), but you can request extra padding.

One fabulous improvement of this ship is that most of the stateroom doors open out into the hallway, so you don't have to squish around each other all the time at the crowded closet/bathroom area by the door. The doors are set back, so they don't actually swing into the hallway. Also, not sure if this is now common, or just part of the Oasis, but you do not have to wear your life jacket to the muster drill. There aren't even life jackets in your room at all. They are at the muster stations.

Overall, I had a great time. I'm sure I'll have more to say about the trip, and that I've forgotten a ton of stuff. And I also haven't gone through all my photos yet. But this has been your general review!

The ship is completely awesome. I do think that the number of passengers makes the personal experience very different from the typical cruise. Usually, you feel like you get to know a lot of people, even on a 3000-passenger cruise. On the Oasis, we rarely saw anyone twice, so if you meet people you want to hang out with again, set it up. You probably won't have a chance meeting in the next seven days. Dinner time is the only time we saw the same people every day. And the ship has an anytime dining option, where you could miss even that. We chose a main dining room seating for that reason. I definitely prefer a smaller number of passengers and would probably go back to a Freedom-class ship rather than taking this one again. Still, this super-enormous wonder of a ship is a must-do vacation if you enjoy cruising!