Real Housewives of Austin

Over lunch, Laura and I cast our own personal Real Housewives of Austin show.

1) Laura. The 3rd grade teacher with a high school daughter and a son about to leave for college. Laura is hilarious, and has a slew of interesting quirks that the audience will only discover as the show progresses over years. Her husband Rich will not appear on the show, because he's so embarrassed he'll want to maintain his privacy.

2) Katherine. The stay-at-home mom who will go by Katherine even though only her mother called her that, when she was a child. She'll say it's because there's another Kathy on the show, but it's really because she wants to sound more sophisticated. She's known Laura for about 14 years. Her daughter is also in high school. Her husband Jeff will want to be on every episode, commenting on the latest storyline.

3) Sharon. The 3rd grade teacher who works with Laura. She is a recent empty-nester and the Voice of Reason. She'll be perfect for those scenes where someone is doing something stupid and she tells them to just stop it. She's also very sweet, to balance out Laura. She'll sometimes be late for carpool which will drive Laura up a wall. I haven't met Sharon's husband, but he will definitely be on the show, because she says he's hot.

4) Tracy. The stay-at-home mom who has the only house comparable to anyone on the actual Housewives series. Sharon is friends with Tracy's sister-in-law. Kathy and Tracy know each other from Bunco. Laura knows Tracy from Mothers Club. Tracy is way fun and very down-to-earth, though she jaunts out to LA to see a Britney Spears concert for her birthday, and that sort of thing. Her husband Vince is a former chef, and I'm not sure if he'll be on or not, but I'm hoping he might totally make us some rockin' meals now and then.

5) Kathy. The self-admitted work-a-holic single mom. A friend of Katherine's since high school. Laura and Sharon know Kathy because her son went to the school where they teach. Kathy has an autistic son in middle school. She is a brilliant PhD and a successful marketing director whose worldwide travels, corporate expense account and wild client parties in Madrid will add a lot of life to the show. We'll all scoff when she complains about having to fly coach to California. Whether her ex wants to or not, we won't let him appear on the show. :p

So come on, Bravo. REAL housewives!