Friday Paper Cutter Tips

Joe on Real Housewives of NJ had a big ol' glass of red wine and Coke this week. Ack. Well I found out that this is a very popular drink in Spain, called Calimocho. Think of it as a Spanish wine cooler. Mix a cheap red wine and cola one-to-one in a pitcher and serve. It sounds questionable to me, and I only have good reds here right now, but I'll try it.

At the library this week, I've been doing a lot of work with the paper cutter. The giant manual sort, with the scary Razor Arm of Death (RAD).

A few tips:

1) Do not lift the RAD and load paper with two hands, placing one beneath the arm, as this will be the moment the RAD drops about three inches, scaring the crap out of you.

2) The cutter has a guide that makes it appear as though it will cut through... I don't know... 150 sheets of paper. In actuality, it cleanly cuts about 8.

3) Do not attempt to cut sticky things with the paper cutter. Just. Don't. Not only do they twist and cut unevenly, but they muck up the RAD, which you then have to clean while trying not to touch it.

4) If you're cutting a ream or two of spiffy cool bookmarks, it is very tempting to increase each subsequent batch size over the aforementioned limit of 8. You think you've invented and perfected the Double-Slice technique, which involves hammering the RAD twice in quick succession, to get that tricky bottom half to cut without ripping. Don't be tempted. People hear the Double-Slice and know exactly what you're doing, and it scares the crap out of them. Plus, you're likely to lose a finger. Then you've ruined tens of bookmarks.

Happy Friday!!